My Testimony to Christ

by  William A. Balson

             I was born in November of 1950 and raised in a Roman Catholic family where we attended church and kept the sacraments.  My parents were good and moral people who shared all of their love in abundance.  While growing up my parents took in and cared for foster children.  Some stayed only a week or two and others for more than 18 years.  Altogether, I had over 20 different foster brothers and sisters in addition to my two older blood brothers.   At any given time there was 8-10 kids in our home.  We grew up in the Syracuse, NY area. ( Parish, East Syracuse )

            By the time I was in my early teens I had grown disillusioned with the Catholic church and with God and religion in general.  While I attended the Catholic church on occasion I was not what one would call a “good Catholic”.  My confirmation and occasional attendance were primarily for the sake of my parents.

            Being a teenager in the 1960s meant that I was also caught up in the “anti-establishment” and “free love” ideology of the time.  The older I became, the more I rebelled and soon found myself involved in an a-moral lifestyle that included sexual immorality, stealing, lying and drinking.  I was convinced that religion and morality were for the weak and the foolish.

            Upon graduating from High School in 1968 I went to SUNY at Plattsburgh, NY.  I quickly joined a fraternity  and drinking became a way of life.  In my second year at college I was introduced to marijuana.  It was then a quick and short road to all of the other drugs that were popular at that time such as hashish, heroin, STP, acid, cocaine and speed.  After several years I dropped out of college and went back to Syracuse.  My life continued on a downhill slide with more drinking, stealing, lying and sin.  In 1970 I was arrested for the possession of false ID.  Having a clean record, I was sure that the charges would be dropped so, in 1971, I moved to Montreal in Quebec, Canada while I was waiting for my trial. 

            In Montreal I lived in a commune where drugs were a way of life.  I was supported by the Canadian Council of Christian Churches as I worked with the underground railroad helping draft dodgers and deserters to get a “landed immigrant” status in Canada.  While in Canada I began to use “crystal speed”.  I went from 190 to 145 lb.s in 3 months.  My skin turned yellow and I went without any sleep for 20 days straight.  I came very close to death.  At that point I believed I was going to die as my body kept going into convulsions and I could eat no food.

Oh, but for the grace of God...

             Around Jan. 1st, 1972 I realized that my only hope to stay alive was to get home.  I took my support money and packed my bag and bought a bus ticket for Syracuse.  Upon arriving at my parents house in E. Syracuse I slept for 3 days straight.  About 3 weeks later I went to my trial, having been told and expecting that I would be put on probation.  The judge, however, had heard that I was living in Canada and decided that I might return and wanted to teach me a hard lesson.  Needless to say, I was shocked to find myself sentenced to 2 years at the county prison in Jamesville, NY for simply possessing false ID..  The judge knew that with a clean record and having never done anything violent that I was a kid who needed to be "scared straight".  He knew that I would spend about 90 days in jail and then be on probation.  He was a pretty smart judge.

            My first day in jail I was welcomed by being taken into the barber shop and being beaten up.  My cell was on the second floor.  It was narrow enough that I could touch both walls at once.  I was sure that my life was over and that I would never be anything other than a convict.

            In April of 1972 ( after only about 75 days ) I was released from prison and on placed on parole for the next two years.  I was required to work, had a curfew and could not leave the area without permission.  I worked as a tree climber and then for Bliss Steel as a finisher pounding steel all day with a large hammer.

My search for love and for truth ...

            Between 1970 and 1973 I had been engaged to be married 3 times.  All three relationships were destroyed by my foolishness, my  rebellious and my sinful, self-centered behavior. 

            Between 1968 and 1974 I had tried a number of different philosophies and religions looking for truth and for hope.  I believed that there must be some kind of meaning to life and truth, but I simply could not find it.  My search took me through transcendental meditation, Buddhism, Mormonism, Jehovah’s Witnesses,  Satin worship, black magic, existentialism, gnosticism and more.   I found nothing that satisfied my desires, my burdens or my needs.  I completely gave up on God and religion.  I read and studied and searched and always came up with something that was a lie or a scam.

When I broke up with my third fiancée in February of 1974, I was positive that there was no real love, no God, no real justice, no truth and no hope.

Praise God for His loving pursuit ...

             In early March of 1974 I was living at home, working at Bliss Steel and involved with the Boy Scouts as a leader.  While doing my laundry at a local Laundromat  one evening I met a young girl ( I was 23 and she was 18. ) who was managing the Laundromat for her parents.  This girl seemed different than any I had met before and she had an inner beauty as well as an outer beauty.  After that brief meeting and short conversation I was left intrigued.

            The young lady in the Laundromat, Nancy, and I had a mutual friend who began to try and get us together.  Nancy, I had come to find out, was a “born again” Christian and her convictions would not allow her to date someone like me who was clearly not a believer.  I was told that Nancy would, however, let me go to church with her.  Upon the prompting of our mutual friend I agreed to go to go to church with Nancy.  My intention was to enlighten this young lady to all of the falsehoods and inconsistencies of her religion.  I was going to graciously rescue her from her faith.

            The morning that I was to meet her in church she had an emergency change of plans and had to take her sister back to Baptist Bible College and was not able to come to church.  I, a godless cynic, found myself in the last place I wanted to be.  I was alone in a Baptist church on a Sunday morning.  ( East Syracuse First Baptist, Pastor Bob Mattox )

            When the pastor preached that morning he simply opened up the Bible and taught us what it said and what it meant and how we could apply it to our life.  The message was clear and simple.  I left with an uneasy feeling and began to feel a heavy weight on my heart.  Throughout the week the weight got heavier.  My cigarettes tasted bad.  My beer tasted bad.  I had no peace.

            The following Sunday evening I returned to the church for the evening service.  It was Palm Sunday, March 31st 1974.  The pastor preached a simple message of forgiveness and hope in Christ as our Lord and Savior.  I was sure that I had heard that message before, but this time was different.  This time the message went into my callused heart like an arrow and broke through my defenses to shed light all the way to the bottom of a dark and hopeless soul. 

            That night I did not know very much about God, Jesus or the Bible.  I didn’t know theology.  I didn’t know about religion.  I didn’t even know how to be forgiven and be saved.  All I knew was that I was a sinner who had found real hope for the first time in my life.  I knew that I needed forgiveness and that this was the only offer in town.

            I have since learned that God, in His love for mankind, sent His only Son to save us from our sin and from eternal hell.  I have learned that God’s gift of forgiveness and life is absolutely free.  I read in God’s Word how that Christ died on the cross to pay for my sins, and not mine only, but the sins of the entire world.  God, in His mercy toward me, did not require me to join a church or a particular religion.  He didn’t even require that I perform some task or pay some small price.  He only asked one thing, that I turn away from my sinful life and in turning to Him that I would trust Him, and Him alone.

            When the sermon was over the pastor gave an invitation.  He said that, if there was anyone who wanted to know how to receive God’s forgiveness,  they could come forward.  Before I knew what I was doing I was out of my seat and walking forward with tears in my eyes.  When I got to where the pastor stood I said, “I don’t deserve to be saved”.  The pastor wisely replied, “None of us do”.  With that I went aside and prayed.  I confessed my sin and told Him that I did believe.  I asked  to be forgiven and to receive Christ as my Savior.

            For every person who comes to God, their faith in Christ is received and expressed a little different.  For me it was a release from my prison of fear, guilt and hopelessness.  I saw the light.  I was set free.  I had finally found hope.  My life was overwhelmingly changed almost immediately.  I was a different person.  My life was never to be the same as it was before that night.

            One week later I was baptized on Easter Sunday in April of 1974.  It was that same week that I was released from being on probation. 

            I began to see that girl from the Laundromat.  Her faith and beauty had captivated my heart and I fell head-over-heels in love.  In May we were engaged and in August of 1974 we were married.  God has since blessed us with 33 years together.  I love her more now than ever.  While on our honeymoon at a Christian camp ( BAYOUCA ) we were both convicted to walk forward and dedicate our lives to Christian service.   In 1975 God blessed with our first daughter and in 1979 we were blessed with our second.

            I also began to teach Sunday School in May of 1974.  I knew nothing and worked hard to prepare for the lesson each week so that I could teach a “junior boys” class.  I bought all the books I could afford and studied the Bible every day.  Within a year I was speaking on the radio.  Within another year I was doing pulpit supply.  In 1976 I began to be an interim pastor at a small Baptist church in Levanna, NY.  Later that year I began attending a Bible seminary.

            Between 1976 and 1983 I was a Sunday School teacher and a Teen Youth leader.  I would often fill the pulpit somewhere and would occasionally do a series of evangelist meetings.  I continued to study the Bible and God continued to work in my life.  For several years I served the Lord in part-time ministry as an interim pastor for churches that were in between pastors.

            In 1983 God called my wife and I into full time ministry when He led us to a small church in Verona Beach, NY.  Now, after completing my degree in Theology and over 25 years in the ministry I find that I appreciate the love and grace of God more than ever before.  I am still just a sinner who is saved by God’s grace, but now I am a child of the King and I am overwhelmingly blessed by the riches of my Father in heaven.  By His grace I have peace, joy, purpose, strength, hope, forgiveness, love and a future that is forever bright.

            My testimony is not to me or to any human being.  My witness is not to religion or to a church.  I am like the blind man in the gospels who said, “This one thing I know, whereas I was blind, now I see.”

    Thank God for His amazing grace.